arianna huffington and me

Tonight i went with my mom to a lecture by arianna huffington. (it was excellent and enlightening)

she spoke about how last week she guest hosted the rachel maddow show.

so i came home and was reading the huffington post. and found the clips from her guest spot on the rachel maddow show.

then i found myself on youtube watching clips of old radio shows by maddow.

which led me to this.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qnZjg-NQXeM

and this is when i say, it's ok, i'm young and impressionable.

i have a lot of conflicting opinions on a lot of things, mostly because i keep trying desperately to learn of different perspectives on different issues and be as informed as i possibly can. and whenever i find a perspective that makes a great deal of sense to me and that i agree with, i find myself jumping over to get behind it, even if it may conflict with something i've said before.

after last week when i was kicking myself for skipping the protest, i was talking to a friend, who actually went, about our conflicting feelings on the gay marriage issue. not that she and i disagreed. just that within herself, and within myself, i feel conflicty about it. because while i'm all for supporting gay rights, i've been frustrated for years at the obsession of the gay 'community' with marriage. and as my very eloquent friend voiced, it's been at the sacrifice of so many issues that are arguably more important.
and before i continue with that thought too far, i'll just connect back to that link and say, good point, rachel maddow! i myself recall being confused with the name HRC. as my dad pointed out, it could actually be a lot of things. turns out, i meant the human rights campaign. which is actually lying in its name because while it sounds like it should be fighting for equal rights for all humans, it's not. it's fighting for rights for gay people in the US. and generally, it seems mostly to be fighting just for the big ticket issues. so, marriage!
but hey look, i found my way back to my point. or my friend's point.
Actually, i find i need to step back to another beginning.
OK. Prop 8 passed. yuck. black voters were significantly against it. as were latino voters. and apparently mormons. But there has been constant complaints of both women's rights movements and gay rights movements that the fail to make efforts to reach out to or include people of color in their efforts. the taboos and visibility in these communities is almost incomparable to the white or mainstream community. if we worked on this , we'd probably get them to like us better. and fewer queer people of color would be victims of discrimination, recrimination, verbal abuse and hate crimes.
There's also the fact that there is a disproportionally high number of homeless queer youth.

Back when i was in college, contemplating writing a thesis, i actually decide what i wanted my thesis to be. but i realised that it couldnt' be an undergraduate thesis. it was something that actually required years of research and finding my way into practically invisible communities. I always wanted to write about that disproportionally high number of homeless queer youth. Where are they, what support system exists for them, and do they become homeless queer adults, or do they eventually find their way back into society? And i kept thinking, surely someone's written about this. but if they had up until 2006, it hadnt' been published in any media i could find in my multiple searches of our database, including lexisnexis (newspapers and magazines), and all sorts of peer reviewed journals.

i digress. but that's the point of a hardly read blog, now, isnt' it?

so many incomplete thoughts/ but i have to go to sleep! arianna huffington says that it's important to get a good night's sleep every night. it will make me a more successful person

prop 8

There was a prop 8 protest in st. louis today. (technically yesterday, as it's after midnight) it was part of a nation wide protest. i found out about it lateish last night, and already had plans to go to a movie with kristin. which, to be fair, we haven't hung out in weeks and haven't been able to go see a movie in like 2 months. and kristin said it wasn't a big deal it's not like prop 8 happened here.
but i knew that was wrong. i wanted to go the the protest, i just didn't. and now, as i'm finally staying up too late and catching up on all my news from the week, i'm kicking myself even more.
here i am, always wanting to get involved, be involved, know what's going on and be aware of events. but i didn't go to this one. no, prop 8 didn't happen here. and maybe my straight friend's perspective on the issue was in part right. but coming together nationwide to say, 'hey, you finally gave us this right, and now you took it away again?' is something i would have liked to be a part of.
it would have been nice to feel a part of something, actually feel the greater community that supports my side, instead of just reading about it on blogs.
stupid me.

but to assuage my guilt at least, i just joined HRC, something i've been meaning to do for like, oh, i don't know, like 4 years?


On Prop 8: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/California_Proposition_8_(2008)
On HRC(the Human Rights Campaign. aka glbt rights org.): http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Human_Rights_Campaign

the time traveler's wife

i just finished this book.
it was stunning. it completely enveloped me. moreso that usual. most books i can either get into and really read for hours, or i can pick up and put down at will. this on was not so. this was a pick-it-up-now-and-you'll-be-late book. a book that should have a warning label of 'don't read before bed, you'll stay up all night'
maybe it was just me.

laura gave me the time traveler's wife for my birthday. yes. in june. she actually gave it to me in may. it takes me a while to get around to reading sometimes, ok?

it made me sad, too. really sad. it goes from confusing to fascinating/riveting to sad. and then stays that way. i'm surprised that i didn't cry, actually..


==
in other news, work was alright again today. better, i stuck to tea. we actually had a pretty great guy teaching us all the starbucks drinks. he allowed everyone to relax and get comfortable with each other, so conversation quickly got less awkward and more interesting. i'm glad for that. back to the policy drones tomorrow, though. it's ok, we're learning the baked goods. this means sampling pastries and cheesecakes and sandwiches and soups. yum.
i wish i had a job that worked outside sometimes. maybe i'll go work for habitat. or there's always that farm...

obama won and i got a job

overall, a good week.

i'm thrilled to see obama having won. and that electoral vote margin pretty much makes me giddy.




but i'm sad to see that in 3 states(california, arizona, florida), a ban on gay marriage was passed. and arkansas passed a scary little bill to ban all gay people and actually, all single people from adopting. WTF??

in positive news on the amanda front, i got a job at barnes and noble cafe. i'm in training this week, and today i learned how to steam milk and when i've had too many espresso drinks ... it's about 2:30. note to self, don't drink coffee anymore. i was too jittery. and i didn't really like it.
tomorrow: frappucinos!
i hear that working at a bookstore cafe is kind of the perfect job for me. now, if only i didn't have to sell things, i think this would be true... but we shall see how it goes.

and last night i went to a run thru of the show i'm asst. light designing... a little thing called Romeo and Juliet, you may have heard of it? and though i'm actually not a big fan of this play generally speaking. it's overdone and rarely well done. but i have to say, this is well done. at least the acting is. i was actually genuinely blown away. i often find myself sitting in these first run throughs thinking, how much longer, this is so painful! but this one, no. i am actually looking forward to running light board on this show. theatre optimism is on the way up again in my little world. (new york, i may yet be returning)

a strange phenomenon though... with all of this working stuff i've been doing, i'm finding myself with much less time to watch and read all the news and crap i usually get into online. i feel so out of touch with the world. i keep telling myself it's good to be actually getting out there. i have been acting more and more a recluse.

it is strange though. i haven't finished a book in like 4 days. i'm actually still working on 2 of the books i was reading last week. i had to renew!

and i haven't had my designated kristin time.

but i did get to talk to kathleen last night, which was really nice.

one thing about working at barnes and noble... turns out, i'm still in missouri. most of the people working in the store have never lived outside of missouri, most of the rest never outside of the midwest. i am trying to control my thoughts and hold my tongue against the idea that this is something against them. mostly, i need to remind myself that i am not too good for this job. yes, it's true, it's not really aiding in my goal of saving the world. but maybe i'll be inspired. or meet the person who will ultimately tell me what it is i'm supposed to be doing with my life. (and confirm that it does not include an office)
but what i actually meant to say before i started sounding like an asshole there is that i have met some interesting people and had some interesting conversations. i hope to have more.

my thoughts are a bit scattered... can you tell? time for bed! more starbucks training and overcaffeination tomorrow.